apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
