Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize