Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
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