i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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