Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
The Olympian is in my bed
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
