Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I currently don't understand fingers.
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