Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
