I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
