So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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