Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize