I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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