It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
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I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
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He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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