yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
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