I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
