This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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