It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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