We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize