I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
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I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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