It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
