butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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