If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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