Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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