Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I wish i was in the wii world.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
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can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
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Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life