Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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