thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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