He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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