I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
