His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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