He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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