He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
you would pick up someone in the library
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
you made out with another girl for some wings
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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