so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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