im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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