OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
