i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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