I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize