I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I still have a little drunk in my system
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
