Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize