One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
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