i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize