come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
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I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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