apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
The beer is more important than you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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