absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
