I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
