Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
