their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
