i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
