how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Just high enough for therapy.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
