Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I FOUND THE LEGS
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize