Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Randomize
