That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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