white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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