marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
time to smoke my breakfast
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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