I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
