he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize